first impressions.

A week and a half ago I said a tearful goodbye to wonderful friends who have greatly influenced this last year of my life and boarded a plane for America. Although I have been "home" for a few days I am still in a state of culture shock. Everything is so much different than I remember, or maybe this last year in Seoul has changed me in ways that I am only just now discovering. Anderson Cooper once wrote about his travels by saying, "The longer you are gone, the harder it is to return." America has been my home for the last 23 years but the longer I stay in Asia the more disconnected I feel upon returning. During these last few days I have felt like an alien walking in a foreign land... moving from point A to B but not knowing how I got there. Only lately are things beginning to make more sense as I try to take things one day at a time. Leaving South Korea was one of the hardest moves I have ever made because I miss the life and friends that I left behind so much more than can be expressed in words. I am so thankful for last 14 months that were spent in Seoul. I think it was one of the most formative and exciting experiences in my life thus far. But now that I am in America I want to do everything I can to take advantage of this time with my family and friends before returning to Asia. I don't want to spend my time here dwelling on past memories or disoriented by the American way of life that now feels foreign. I know that the future is full of opportunites to travel, explore, and learn and I am excited to see where life leads. Despite the frequent feelings of sadness and confusion, I will find reason to rejoice!

First impressions upon returning to America:

- The pace of life. After living in a big city like Seoul the American suburbs seem like such a lonely place with their big houses and fenced yards. Everyday I find myself longing to return to a place full of streetside cafes, crowded shopping districts, and busy subways. I miss the constant movement of the city.

- The people. For the last 2 1/2 years I have been surrounded by thin, well-dressed Asians with black hair and almond shaped eyes. Although people are all unique in thier own way, they have the same defining features. Now I find myself in a place where everyone looks drastically different. I can't help but stare at the strange looking, oddly shaped men and women of various colors and sizes that I encouter throughout the day. We are a strange looking race (myself included). Now I understand why so many guys are attracted to Asian women... I would be too!

- The sky. I love the saying that everything is bigger in Texas, and it's true! I love driving along the highway and watching the sunset stretch across the earth. I haven't seen a sky this big, or blue, in a long time.

- The culture. Upon returning to America I have been trying to find something that defines this country. I never realized how diverse our nation is until I began traveling. In America it's not uncommon to see people from many different countries in a single day, or to eat Chinese food for dinner one night and Mexican the next. But in some ways I think this "melting pot" society has erased all uniqueness and left us without our own culture. One of the things I love about Asia is the distinct differences between thier way of life and my own... using chopsicks, eating rice at every meal, bowing to say hello, taking your shoes off in someone's home, practicing tae kwon do, etc. I am on a quest to discover what defines America.

final thoughts.

It's a beautiful fall day in Korea and I've been wandering the streets of Seoul for the last few hours. Work is finished, I have moved out of my apartment, and the return to America is only days away. It's a strange feeling to walk around the city that has been home for the last 14 months and to know you are possibly looking at everything for the final time. Today I feel like the most blessed person on earth as I reflect on the wonderful memories made throughout this last year. One person doesn't deserve so much. I am so thankful to have worked at a school that was organized and efficient and genuinely cared for its teachers. I am thankful to have been given a nice apartment in a beautiful neighborhood that felt like home. I am thankful to have had the opportunity to travel to so many places in Korea and throughout Asia during the last year. And above all, I am thankful for the friendships that were developed here. When I moved to Seoul last August I never imagined I'd find such wonderful people to share the experience with. None of this would have been nearly as fun, or as memorable, if it weren't for my friends that now feel more like family. My mind is flooded with thoughts of nights spent dancing until 4 am in Hongdae, mornings spent talking over a cup of coffee in Olympic Park, bike riding through the neighborhood, playing charades on a love motel bed, shopping with the girls in our favorite areas of the city, learning to snowboard during the cold winter, taking weekend trips to the beach, teaching beautiful Korean children English, developing deep friendships with people from all parts of the world, etc. The incredible moments I've been lucky enough to experience are too numerous to list. I am immensely grateful for this last year of life.

I am trying hard to remain joyful as I reflect on my time in Korea, although a part of me feels sad to leave it all behind. I already anticipate the ache in the pit of my stomach when the plane departs Seoul on Sunday morning. I know this will be the hardest move yet, but I feel confident that life will work out exactly as it is supposed to. As I sit next to the window now in this quiet coffee shop over-looking the streets of Insadong I can see red and yellow and orange leaves float to the ground outside. The changing seasons remind me of God's consistent love. Every year spring fades to summer, and summer to fall, because He directs the movement of the entire world. In the same way, I know God is in control of my life and I have faith that He will never lead me towards something new without having a greater purpose. I constantly wonder if leaving the home I've created in Korea is the right desicion, but I can't deny the pull I feel towards China. Although sad about ending this season in my life, I am excited to return to the country where my love affair with Asia first began. There is so much in store for the future and I eagerly aniticpate the start of something new. Goodbye Korea...

"Change is the essence of life. Be willing to surrender what you are for what you could become." -unknown

home on the other side.

Today I miss this house and the people who live inside.



It's hard to believe that I will return to America in 22 days. It doesn't seem real.

happiness is...

Trips to beautiful beaches (Wando and Busan) with great friends.

Dongjip wars that never end.

Train rides to new cities.

American Apparel v-necks and Uniqlo hoodies.

Pot luck dinners and charades.

Spending time with a certain Korean-American.

City-wide scavenger hunts in the rain.

Watching indie films at the Busan International Film Festival.

Cheesy love motels with flowered wallpaper and Thomas Kincade window shades.

Inspring/encouraging emails from my best friend in the solar system.

Jogging along the Han River at night.

Hookah bars and mexican food in Gangnam.

Sitting at a coffee shop and drinking a latte while writing in my journal.

Reading a book about India and knowing that I'll be there soon.

Thinking about Christmas in America for the first time in 3 years.

Fall weather.

Enjoying every moment in Seoul before time runs out.

happy korean thanksgiving!

A few weeks ago Korea celebrated one of its most important holidays, Chusok. In honor of the day, the students at school dressed in Hanboks and played traditional Korean games. It was so much fun to see all of my little kindergarten kids looking nice in their brightly colored clothes representative of their culture. Here are a few photos from the day:


playing a korean stick tossing game. i didn't quite understand the concept.


i sincerely hope that someday i have a little asian girl whose eyes completely close when she smiles.


claire and her red dress.


charlie. the ladies' man.


a few of the girls.

Check out my Flickr site to see more photos from Chusok!

bali, indonesia: ubud.

I haven’t been updating my blog very frequently, and although the contents of this post are in the past, I’d still like to share some photos and journal entries from one of the most fascinating places I’ve ever traveled in Southeast Asia. During my weeklong holiday in Bali, Indonesia I spent some time near the center of the island in a little village called Ubud. The moment my rickety old bus arrived in this laid-back town situated in the middle of rice paddies that stretch on as far as the eye can see in every direction, I knew I was somewhere incredible. In Ubud monkeys roam freely…. they jump across rooftops, eat leftover prayer offerings in front of homes and stores, and eagerly wait for willing tourists to feed them in the Monkey Forest Sanctuary. Women dress in traditional sarongs with a single white strip of cloth tied across their foreheads. Men navigate the roads by moped while wearing Balinese wraps around their waist and bandana-like cloth piled on their heads. Cafés, massage parlors, temples, and souvenir shops line the streets. The entire place is rich with culture and beauty. I’ve always heard that in Ubud you need a new adjective to describe the word green, and I found that to be true. The rice paddies and trees and plants surrounding the village seemed to explode into every imaginable shade in the spectrum. I have never seen a place so beautiful and exotic. The few days I spent in Ubud were some of the most relaxing and peaceful I’ve ever experienced. I already look forward to returning one day.


balinese boys posing for a photo.


hard at work in the rice paddies.


one of hundreds.

“Ubud. There are no words to adequately describe the beauty of this place. I woke up this morning in a quiet cottage surrounded by lush vegetation and rice paddies. I ate banana pancakes by the hotel pool, and now I am laying here just enjoying the morning. I don’t want to move. I don’t want to read. I don’t even want to meet other tourists. I just want to lay here next to flowers and fountains and soak up every ounce of my surroundings. I have landed in a village of fairy tales. This moment can’t be real. Last night after eating dinner at a street side café I watched a traditional Balinese Kecak dance performed at a nearby temple. It was fascinating to hear dozens of men make music with only their lips…a kind of clicking sound. Ornately dressed men and women danced around a central fire while acting out a story passed on through the generations. An incredible night.

It’s afternoon now and I can easily say that this has been one of the most unique and interesting days of my life. I decided to take a walk this morning through some of the nearby rice fields, and unable to follow a map, ended up in a village far away from Ubud. I have no idea where I was, but ended up making friends with a nice Balinese guy about my age who was working at his family’s art gallery. After talking for a while, I boldly asked if he’d be willing to take me to explore the rice paddies. And that’s what I’ve been doing for the last 2 hours. Right now I am sitting on the ledge of what must be one of the most spectacular places on the island- and maybe in the world. Terraced rice paddies fill the valley below, palm trees stretch into the sky, and men with baskets hanging on poles across their shoulders work in the fields. Green. Everything is green. I can’t get enough of this place. This morning I woke up without a plan for the day, and now I am here. Travel always brings the most unexpected moments. I love the people that you meet along the way and the kind natives who are eager to share their country. Today I can’t stop smiling. I am so thankful.” – July 31, 2008


terraced rice paddies.


monkey forest sanctuary.


my hotel pool. paradise.

“CONTENTMENT. It’s the only word that does justice to my feelings now. How can anyone ever return to “normal” life after experiencing a place like Bali? I’ve only been in Ubud for 2 days, but they have been some of the most incredible I’ve ever experienced. I’ve spent mornings tanning by a pool set in a lush garden, an afternoon whizzing through rice fields and villages on the back of a moped, an evening getting a relaxing massage, and a night watching Balinese dances at historic temples. It doesn’t seem fair that one person should be allowed to experience so much joy. I feel on top of the world now. Last night I saw a traditional trance dance at the Ubud Palace in the center of town. The performance was incredible…a photographers dream. The men and women were all so ornately dressed in layers and layers of decorative silks and jewels. Their faces were covered in outrageous make-up. And their eyes… I’ve never seen eyes move so quickly or express so much emotion. I will never find the right worlds to tell my family and friends about this place. My dreams have come true here.” – August 1, 2008


traditional balinese dance.


trance dance at ubud palace.


kecak dance. (press the play button in the middle of the picture)

free falling.

Yesterday afternoon a few friends and I took the subway to the outskirts of Seoul to a park for bungee jumping. Last October when we were in the area everyone was brave enough to jump, except for me. Yesterday I was determined not to chicken out. I still can’t believe I let myself free fall from a 140 ft. platform trusting that a rope would catch me! Although it was one of the scariest moments of my life, I’d definitely do it again.

Here’s a short video clip from my jump: